


The Other Side

by craziestscience



Category: Orphan Black (TV)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-02
Updated: 2015-12-07
Packaged: 2018-04-29 13:35:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,890
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5129561
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/craziestscience/pseuds/craziestscience
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In the events following the Season 3 finale, what happened to Delphine Cormier, and what will Cosima and her sisters do to find her?<br/>*Rated M for future chapters</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

The last of the wine was gone, and so was most of the victory-party goers. Most had gone just after dinner, with Sarah and Siobhan gone just twenty minutes before now. Early morning flight, they didn't want to be out too late. There was an oddly nice lull that came over the room, with just quiet branched-off conversations and food gone cold. 

"There is a severe lack of booze left, and I'm not about to start getting into the soap-smelling nonsense."

Felix flopped down on the chair next to Cosima with a flourish, only noticing a moment later that the brunette hadn't heard a word he'd said. Instead, her eyes fixed on nothing in particular out the window, her thumb rhythmically passing over the black screen on her phone. 

"Not that it wouldn't be an interesting experiment, what with human cannibalism being a side effect."

"Hm?"

Felix smiled, nudging her side with his elbow. "You're a terrible listener when you've got the Frenchwoman on your mind."

Cosima cracked a smile, dimples creasing her cheeks as she bowed her head into her palm. "That obvious?" 

Felix shrugged, though the smirk on his face was a knowing one. "You legitimately have zero sense of calm when it comes to her. I can't even understand it."

It was nice, in that moment, that he wasn't on the attack about her. Cosima hadn't eaten a thing since she'd come back in from outside, with pink in her cheeks that had nothing to do with the cold. Felix prodded her about why Delphine hadn't come in, but Cosima had deflected most of his questions. Something felt off to her, and she really couldn't pinpoint it. She replayed the moment over and over in her mind; the kiss that she didn't want to end, the tears in her paramour's eyes, the slight hitch in her voice. There had been a time in her life when she was so attuned to the other woman, that it felt like she didn't have to hear a word she said to be able to understand completely what she was feeling. How much of a fool had she been to lose sight of that, to allow herself to become to distant that she couldn't see past her own pain?

Even now, as she sat with Felix, she wondered. There was something that made her heart beat faster, and not in a good way. Those words she'd said, how she'd said them ... there was almost something _finite_ about them. Cosima was trying not to dwell, but her ever curious mind couldn't stand down from picking apart every second, every feeling. She couldn't shake the feeling that she had missed something big. 

It hadn't even been that long, an hour maybe, as she sat distracted, pondering every mistake that had been made over the past several months. Hers, mostly, because she couldn't judge anyone else for theirs. She'd ignored a call from Shay, a twist in her gut that was borderline guilt. Not for ignoring the call, but for something much bigger than that. She didn't like being alone, and she'd jumped headfirst into something she wasn't remotely ready for. There was logic that a person couldn't (or shouldn't) use one person to get over another. It would never work. It certainly hadn't for Cosima. The minute she'd _seen_ Delphine sitting in her lab had been a gut-punch. She tried to hard to be stubborn, focusing on anger and pain rather than the magnetic pull she felt toward the other woman. Her whole resolve nearly crumbled time and again, until she felt she had no choice but to confess something she hadn't wanted to. Even then, the moment their lips mercifully touched again, it felt to Cosima as though she was finally breathing properly. 

"Ready to go?"

Cosima was so lost in her thoughts that she hadn't even been aware that everyone was readying to clear out. "Sure," She nodded, a soft breath of laugh to herself. 

Standing up, she'd never had a feeling like this one. It wasn't as though she'd stood too fast and got a head rush. It wasn't like when she was extremely sick and needed to take a minute to steady herself. No, this was more like a shudder that ran down every vertebrae in her spine. It was a fast air out of her lungs, room spinning kind of thing. She felt as though she was struck by something hard, hot and cold at the same time if that was even possible. Alison was the one to grab onto her arm, worrying over her. "All the color drained right out of your face, are you okay? Are you feeling dizzy?" She rattled off questions and Cosima waved them away, insisting she was fine even as she still kept a grip on her sister's arm.

Whatever it was, it felt like a part of her had been ripped away, and for whatever reason … she only thought of Delphine.

* * *

Religion had no place in a scientist's mind. That's what Delphine had told herself (and others) several times over the course of her lifetime. She put her faith, her trust, her belief in the things she could see. If she could not quantify something, how was she supposed to give power to some kind of fairy tale? Soulmates, fate, destiny — these things fell into that same category. Cosima had known her well enough to tell her, she didn't believe in "that stuff". That was a moment when, staring at the other woman, she truly wished that she had. Cosima had changed her in so many ways over the time they had been together. In some ways, even believing in something like love was of the "fairy tale" category. She'd never actually been in love before — not like what she had felt with Cosima. Since boarding school in her youth, she'd watched friends and classmates fall "madly" in love with someone, only to protest their hatred for that same person weeks, maybe months later. It was absurd to her, watching how powerless these people would be, all in the name of some romantic idea. 

Falling in love with Cosima had come slowly, gradually even as she felt herself giving in more and more to the feeling of it. Contrary to what she'd observed in others, the love she felt for the other woman did not make her weak, but empowered her. It did not consume her, but it lifted her up. She was challenged, frustrated at times, but in the end better for the love they grew with each other. In the end, lying on the floor of that damn garage, it was Cosima's face that she saw. It was her words, declaration of love and how overwhelming that felt which flooded through her body. It gave her a sense of warmth even as the cold took over, as her body began to tremble. It wasn't fear of dying; it was fear of not being there for her lover. Even when they were apart, her whole being centered around keeping her, and her sisters safe. Who would take her place?

A lovely dream, that felt too real — yet she couldn't grasp at anything as consciousness began to pull her back. She wasn't dreaming of pain but of moments of joy, of Cosima's laughter, the touch of her skin, her lips. It was a warm, delicious place to be in, and the sharp _beep_ sound that rhythmically pulled her away from it. She wanted to stay, almost begged for such a thing to whom … she did not know. 

"She's healing nicely." 

The voice was not one she recognized, but it clawed at her, somewhere out of the din. It gave her a gut instinct to pull away, recoil from prodding fingers and the dull ache they garnered from her abdomen. Her hands moved first, clenched fists attempting to jerk back but staying in place because of something restraining her. Her eyes fluttered open to bright florescent lights of a sterile room. Panic rose in her chest and she could hear the monitor beeping in correlation with that. 

"Qui es-tu? Qu'est-ce que je fous là?"

"Doctor Cormier, good to see you awake. My name is Doctor Weathersby, you're in my hospital." There was no comfort in his tone. On the contrary, it was too-nice, too … almost a Pleasantville kind of quality to his demeanor, just in how he carried himself. He meant to soothe, but she instead felt like her skin was crawling. There was a certain tone in how he said _my hospital_. She'd met doctors who had claimed such a thing as a way to calm their patients, instill a sense of control over whatever situation they were facing. To Delphine, it felt like a threat, and she couldn't understand why. 

"Why have I been restrained?" She asked as clearly as she could, her voice rough from not being used and English faltering a little. 

"Oh that was simply so you wouldn't hurt yourself. You've been through an incredibly traumatic incident, and we took every precaution to make sure you healed well."

There was that _we_ , too. She felt a sharp rise of bile at the back of her throat. He didn't even make a single move to release her, either. She studied his features as her brain tried to focus, tried to put together pieces that were at best, fractured and all over the place. She remembered so little, after the initial moment the bullet tore through her body. 

"Now you rest up, Delphine." The sudden shift in something as simple as her name felt _wrong_. Too familiar, too intimate. "A nurse will be in to check your vitals." She began to protest, but he turned to leave as though she hadn't made a sound at all. 

The whole situation gave her a very eerie, unsettled feeling. This would only grow as she looked up to see the nurse walk in, with silver hair and a single white iris to match.


	2. Chapter 2

Cosima could remember so vividly the first time her hand slid into Delphine's. Coupled with the silken voice of _Enchantée_ , she'd felt comically as though her heart might burst clean out of her chest like some old cartoon. She was all dimples and smiles, giddy without meaning to be, but she remembered looking into Delphine's tear-filled eyes and remarking in her own mind how sad she looked. Even days later, when she'd known that had been a lie, there were times when she thought about that very thing. Delphine had in her a deep sadness, one that she couldn't reach, she couldn't brighten without Delphine sharing that part of herself. They had been so close, so many times, but then Delphine had pushed her away and Cosima had grown so stubborn to allow herself to be. Her mind played the idiotic game of _what if?_ far too often. What if she'd said no. What if she'd denied Delphine when she'd come to break things off with her? What if she hadn't let her fear of being left, her fear of being _alone_ in the world rule her heart and instead stood for the thing, the _person_ even, who had made her feel whole. Cosima didn't put that kind of pressure on a relationship, especially not the one she had with Delphine, but it was in the way that the French woman accepted her — all of her — that made her feel as though she could do anything, be everything with her. Their sometimes volatile dynamic just drove that point home; it was how they challenged each other that made them better. In the end they always came together, how could she have forgotten that?

So she dreamed of her hands. It was such a funny thing. Of all things her mind seemed intent on focusing on, it was Delphine's hands that rooted in her mind the most. Dreams bled into memories, as consciousness drew her back to reality, she so often kept her eyes closed, preferring to live inside those memories than face what the day might bring.

_The languid movements of Delphine's hands were somewhat of a frustration to Cosima. She seemed so methodical in the way she moved them, seeking out the exact spot for the exact reaction she wished to garner. The way they skirted over her ribcage, delicate and soft so it caused her stomach to concave on reflex with a shuddering breath; how they'd more aggressively grip at the undersides of her thighs, in stark contrast to how the pads of her palms rested so gently on her cheeks moments before their lips touched._

_She played her body like an instrument only she knew how to master._

_"Do you play the piano?"_

_It was a nonsensical thing to ask, and completely out of nowhere as Delphine's current positioning should have rendered her speechless, not asking questions. Even her voice hitched in her throat midway through the question in direct response to Delphine's lips grazing against the inside of her thigh._

_The blonde's laugh was low and deep, muffled as teeth touched to Cosima's sensitive skin. "Oui, I used to. Should I be offended you're thinking of other things right now?"_

_The grin on her face was one that Cosima would remember. Flushed cheeks and bright eyes staring up at her like she did. It took her breath out of her already labored lungs, and took a full moment to shake her head. "No, no. I was just…" Her hands flailed expressively before she caught one of Delphine's, bringing her hand up to kiss her palm. "I love your hands."_

_Delphine laughed again, this time distinctively on the move as her lips pressed to Cosima's stomach, and another few peppered up her body until she nestled herself between her legs, skin flushed against one another's. This was their most natural state, Cosima would think, when the rest of the world faded to oblivion and all she felt was the warmth created between them._

_"My hands? You're absurd." Everything that was said between them now had a lazy quality to it, a smile laced in every syllable._

_"I'm not! They're beautiful, like the rest of you."_

_Delphine's eye roll in response was a good natured one, her head bowing against Cosima's neck. "You're just, mm…" She paused, searching just a second for the word, raising her face to look at her paramour. "Enamored."_

_Cosima's smile was immediate; the kind that broke across every inch of her face and radiated from somewhere deep within her. "I really am."_

"Cos. It's time to get up."

Her reverie was snapped in two, hearing her sister's voice. It was gentle, but the urgency behind it was unmistakeable. 

"What time is it?"

"Early. We're meeting S. Get dressed."

"Has there been any…"

Sarah was already shaking her head, a hand reached out to squeeze Cosima's arm. "Not yet."

One might think she'd be used to it by now. That hope would have tapered off into indifference. The "no" would become a mantra, and she'd just be elated if she ever got another answer. But she didn't. She'd nearly given up on Delphine once. She had been stubborn, even selfish. She wouldn't do that again. She was stronger than that, damn it. 

"Give me a minute." 

Cosima was up and walking across the flat, through the beads to the bathroom to throw water on her face. Reality was nowhere near as good as her dreams, but she had to leave them now, leave them until the next time she slept.

Three weeks, five days, something like eight hours. That's how long it had been since she'd last seen Delphine. Less time, by a couple of days, since that pain in her gut rose into a panic. Dull to begin with, but rising, increasing until she'd filled Delphine's voicemail with messages. Felix had made a crack, trying to break through some tension, and she'd nearly bit his head off. It wasn't to be joked about, and soon, the rest of them realized that too. The only lead they'd had was finding Delphine's car … torched by the river bank. Shay had given her a card that Delphine had given her, too. It was supposed to lead Cosima to trust her, to tell her, open up … but she'd simply taken it from the short blonde and apologized for the drama she'd been embroiled in. It was the last she'd see of her, but she kept that card with Delphine's handwriting on it in her wallet. There had been times she'd stared at it, willing it to have some message etched into the gold ink. Nothing. It was a puzzle she couldn't solve, and the stakes were higher than anything she'd ever experienced before. 

"Okay," She said with a flourish, pulling on her shoes and tying her hair back into an organized mess of dreads. "Let's see what she's got."

* * *

Delphine was strong. This was what she would tell herself every single day. She'd wake up from the few (if that) hours of sleep she'd been able to settle into the night before, and grasp onto the dreams that echoed in her mind as daylight came. She wasn't afraid, it became a mantra. She would not be weak. She would not succumb to anything thrown her way. She was stronger than that, stronger than them.

They cared for her here, made sure she had healed. Made sure she had food, water. It was the softness that was the most unsettling part. They would soothe her, only after putting her through pain — but the pain was not physical, oh no. That she could handle. It was the threat to those she loved that she could not. Her insides ached for reprieve, but her mind -- that was what she was trying to keep sharp. They had these tactics that were unlike anything she'd experienced before. She'd read about mind control, about Stockholm Syndrome, about any other myriad of ways to control someone's mind, change it, mold it. Her physical pain was of her own doing -- trying to free herself in the times she was left alone, picking at screws, floorboards ... but she was never fully alone. She'd found the camera yesterday, and should have known better. 

Now she was left alone in her room, left to run over the conversation from the morning over and over again in her head. _Make no mistake, Doctor Cormier. You will be working for us_. It wasn't how assured Doctor Weathersby (whose first name she still didn't know) was, but how _kind_ his words sounded. It was so unsettling, knowing it was a threat, but having it delivered gift wrapped so nicely. She craved _someone_ being outright awful to her. She wanted someone to gnash her teeth at, to dig her heels into, to _fight_ against. This was more like she'd been taken captive by pod people. Neolutionists. Perhaps that was the same difference. 

She was taken back to what Nealon had told her now … weeks ago. He'd insisted that she had no idea where the science actually was. Her curious mind had spun in overtime, but she still had no answers. Turns out, that's what they were betting on. Her own curiosity might be her downfall — if she let it be. 

The door opened again, sending a jolt to hear heart for the millionth time, it seemed. Every time someone entered her "quarters", she had no idea what to expect. Perhaps more than anything, it was the lack of control that broke her down, drove her crazy. 

Doctor Weathersby walked in with the gate of a man who knew he was handsome, and knew he was in control — Delphine might liken him to "frat boy" by those standards, if it wasn't for his scientific brain. 

"These were what I was telling you about, Delphine." He sat on the plush chair across from where she sat on the end of her bed without invitation. In his hand, he held out a tiny hexagon shape. "Go ahead." She hesitated, before picking it up, no bigger than a fingernail. 

"What is it?"

She'd clearly asked the right question, judging by the smile on his face. "Ah. This is an implantable chip. Now, you've seen the body enhancements — those are external, frivolous, even. Now this… This taps into the _brain_ , Delphine. It opens up the kind of power in the mind that's been relegated to science fiction before now. We're still testing it … but the results thus far have been monumental."

Delphine's brow furrowed, cold running in her veins as she handed the chip back to him. "It seems highly irresponsible. What's the endgame, for this kind of technology?"

There was that _smile_ again. The one that gave her a shudder, that made her think as though she were only there for a very certain, nefarious purpose. Nobody was telling her anything, just pieces. It was driving her nuts. "And what does it have to do with me?"

"It should come as no surprise to you have one of the greatest scientific minds we've come across. Nealon was right … no matter how that turned out." His gaze was pointed to her, but they'd had that discussion before. "The technology isn't ready yet, and we've had some … disappointments in the test process. The body fights against the technology."

"You overload the brain." It wasn't hard to put together, but Weathersby smiled, impressed by her deduction. 

"Exactly. And we would rather that feature be … _optional_."

"This isn't exactly my area of expertise, you realize."

"Oh don't sell yourself short. We'll get you into the lab and you'll have a team helping you. We have the utmost faith in your abilities." 

Somehow, it didn't seem like a compliment. 

"And you didn't answer my question. What do you plan on using this for?" Standing now, Weathersby moved towards the door. 

"That's on a need to know basis, don't you worry about that."

"And if I refuse?"

His tongue clicked as if he were scolding a child. "What about your present circumstance makes you think you have that choice?"

He was gone moments later, leaving Delphine curling into herself on the end of the bed. With her chin resting on her knees, she let her eyes fall closed and a conscious effort to steady her breathing. Powerless was not something Delphine Cormier was used to feeling. Reliant on others, even — nope. Perhaps she could figure this out. If she appeared to cooperate … no, they'd know otherwise. 

Falling flat onto her back, she heaved a sigh and stared at the ceiling. "Merde." She would figure out a way out of here. She had to.


	3. Chapter 3

"The tapes were scrubbed, that's why we couldn't find anything."

Siobhan sat at a laptop, clicking away at files to find the one in particular she was looking for. Huddled around in a now-closed Bubbles, Sarah impatiently tapped her foot and huffed before picking up a jar — just to have something to do with her hands. 

"Ah —" Alison lifted her hands in a bit of a halting manner, but stopped herself short. She'd reign in her "please don't break anything" mentality for the moment. 

"What do you mean, scrubbed?" Cosima wasn't anywhere near the computer. In fact, it was as though she was doing what she could to stay as far away from it as possible. It seemed as though in her mind, that laptop contained a snake that might lash out and bite her at any moment. Of course, she knew what scrubbed _meant_ , but in current circumstances, she wanted clarification.

"Someone went to great efforts to erase any and all footage of that night. And did a great job of it. Whomever these people have is good … My guy is better." There was a hint of satisfaction in the Irish woman's voice, but she knew better than to gloat at present. One look at Cosima, and it was quite a sobering feeling. "I'm not sure you want to see this, luv." 

Turning back to the rest of them, Cosima decided to garner strength from the four women there. Whatever it was … it had to be better than not knowing. It was Helena whose hand found hers as she joined them. It was still a wonder to her, the affection that her sister offered particularly when any of them really needed it. 

"Here's where it starts, you can see through the grain … here." The footage was indeed grainy, blacked out, glitching into snow only to come back into faded picture moments later. Cosima's heart pounded in her chest, but felt like it lurched straight into her ribcage at the sight of Delphine walking through the garage. 

"What are you doing?" She whispered to herself more than anyone else, watching as the footage cut, then came back in time to see her fall. Everything in her seized, insides turned to ice as the breath expelled from her lungs. Alison put a hand to her back, keeping her upright. There were no words whatsoever that she could form in her brain — just watch, as the footage went on. 

A van — but not one of those cliche no-windowed things, but more of a … well, it looked like a medical transport. 

"Who are they?" Sarah chimed in, having closed the space and now leaned over Siobhan's shoulder. The precision with which a team spilled out of the car and moreover, the _care_ with which they loaded Delphine into the back of the van felt so pre-planned. For Cosima's part, watching them had an odd mixture of lessening anxiety, but _more_ worry. 

"I think it's safe to say," Siobhan started, pressing pause on the video as the van disappeared out of the garage, "Whoever they are, they weren't planning on letting her die." It was supposed to be comforting, but it only gave them all more questions. 

"This happened at Dyad, yeh? Nobody's been back there for weeks. And they haven't come after us." Sarah needled the puzzle in her head, trying to spin it into something she could wrap her mind around. 

Helena huffed a sound, a look crossing her face that to Cosima felt like it said all at once: _go time_. "We burn science place to ground." 

For a moment, everyone was silent. Honestly, it sounded like a good idea. 

"No," Cosima finally spoke, her voice croaking out before she cleared it. "That would only provoke them." 

"How do we even know who _they_ really are at this point? Sarah gets a call that "they", these … Neolutionist _freaks_ are everywhere and … Goodness, it's just too much." Alison's voice got increasingly shrill as she went on, finally huffing off with hands flailed in exasperation. 

"So what do you suggest, we just let them do … whatever they want with her?" There was a fire in Cosima as she spat the words, and even she knew her anger was displaced. She couldn't help it, everything felt like it was tumbling down around her. 

"No one is saying that, Cos." Sarah shook her head, looking back at the computer screen. 

"That's not what I meant, Cosima." Alison agreed gently. "They took one of us. And they are going to pay for that. Be sure of it."

_One of us_. Coming from any of her sisters, but perhaps especially Alison … it wasn't expected, but it touched at something deep within her. She felt for a moment, her resolve might crumble, but she simply pursed her lips together and nodded. "Yeah."

"I say again. Give me hour, Science building will be _rubble_." Helena's logic wasn't sound, but it sounded better by the minute. 

"Easy, Helena. We're not going to blow up a building and end up in prison or dead." 

Sarah was thinking, still playing over the newest information in her head, and how it fit in with the rest they knew. One solution was glaringly obvious, and it kind of made her skin crawl to bring it up. Alison and Cosima however, were right. They couldn't leave her to the mercy of Neolution. Honestly, that was dangerous in more ways than one. "I know who we need to call."

* * *

Morning was a time of day that Delphine had always favored. As a child, she'd woken early, even unto the wee hours of the morning because she felt like she might miss something if she slept late. In boarding school, mornings were one of the rare times that she felt like she could be alone with her thoughts, before the stress of the day seeped in. She could spend hours of the morning, looking out over a rainy Paris and feel more content than any other part of the day. 

Delphine never reveled in the idea of sharing her bed with someone. She enjoyed her space, preferring to sprawl across the bed rather than fighting over blankets. There was something different in the way she had slept in the same bed with Cosima. The first time they'd _slept_ in the same bed, she'd been alarmed as the brunette wound her arms around her, clinging her body so close to Delphine's. The surprise that came was that Delphine didn't mind it. The times she'd been without Cosima after the time sharing each others' bed, she'd begun to sleep poorly without that kind of close warmth. She missed the way their bodies fit perfectly to each other, hips squared off against one another as bare skin created a furnace between them. She missed the way Cosima's breath fanned against her neck as she tucked her face into the crook of her neck and fell asleep, limbs a tangle together. She'd missed the taste of sunlight on her skin, as morning broke and she so often found herself unable to control the desire that overtook her entire being. Mornings with Cosima. Those had been some of the greatest of her life. 

Morning came too soon. These days, Delphine always felt so ill prepared for the daylight. She didn't want to be, but she felt more and more broken apart in her current state. What made it feel worse, she'd swear, is that she didn't particularly even _dream_ anymore, at least not that she remembered. In those first days, weeks even, she clung to the amount of time she was able to sleep — mostly morphine induced — because it gave her a reprieve from the unsettling place she found herself in. In her dreams, she was in better control, even if they did tip into the "surreal" at times. She dreamt mostly of good things, of home. Home, which had nothing to do with a place, or a room. It was a person. It was _her_ person. She wasn't allowed to have favorites; even promised herself that she didn't. Anyone who looked at her however, knew there was no hiding how much a certain woman with dreadlocks and dimples for days held her heart. She'd tried so hard to break away from that, but only served to close herself off, and in turn, made everyone more vulnerable. 

These days, it was easier not to think about the better parts of her life. She had her moments of resolve; she had to, to keep her sanity. She worried over Cosima and her sisters. She even missed them. But fantasies were exactly that — and dangerous, in her current state. She felt her hope draining from her by the second. She was stubborn, angry even, but those things merely covered the deeper problem. She could lash out in her own way, and yet when she closed her eyes at night, she felt as though she were resigning herself to this. They were breaking her down, and she knew it. She wanted to fight against it, but she was just so tired. 

Today, they showed her the lab space. A team with a variety of … _enhancements_ awaited her with saccharine smiles and overly helpful attitudes. The seemingly youngest one, Edmund, caught her up on the work they had done thus far. She found herself drifting, and not even recognizing herself when she caught a glimpse of herself in the glass windows. 

"I'm going to need to see the sequence itself, I cannot go off of these charts of hypotheses you've given me." It seemed as though her sharp tone didn't _fit_ into this world they'd created. Too much positivity, too much encouragement. Delphine felt as though all eyes were on her in that moment, but she simply stared back at the young man. If they wanted her mind, they were damn sure going to deal with whatever came with it. 

"I'll um, speak with Doctor Weathersby." 

That right there, was perhaps the very first time that Delphine felt a flicker of herself all day. She felt in that moment, as though she was allowed to live in her own power. In that moment, it wasn't going to get figuratively smacked out of her. 

"Good. And tell him I want to speak with him about the usage of this technology. I want to be sure that this will not go into another of your … experiments without my go-ahead. That is non-negotiable." 

The young man seemed more like a deer in headlights than an actual foil for her. Clearly, he hadn't anticipated anything but utter compliance. It helped, a lot, actually. In her world that seemed to be draining _hope_ by the hour, it almost made her feel normal. It almost made her feel as though she could find a way out of here. Maybe the secret was in the science. Maybe she could stall long enough for … something to happen. Her mind wasn't there yet, but in the meantime, she would assert herself in whatever capacity she could. 

Then again… maybe they in fact were just waiting to get her into the lab, to let her feel more like _herself_ after weeks of being sequestered. That was a thought to be relegated for later, when she had the space to mull it over. Right now, she needed to focus on what the hell these people actually wanted from her.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my apologies for the delay, everyone! the holidays and work have bogged me down, but thank you for being patient!

"Well, you certainly have gotten yourself into a pickle, haven't you?"

Cosima glanced at Sarah, whose expression said exactly what Cosima was feeling: This guy's voice was like nails on a chalkboard. Some mixture of humor only he understood, and definitive condesension. 

"Yeah. You going to help us or what?"

Leave it to Sarah to get right to the point. Bless her for that, really. When she had suggested that the person they needed to call was the tall, ambiguously aligned Ferdinand, it was Mrs. S who protested the strongest. She'd warned them that he couldn't be trusted, that someone like him could turn on a dime and then back again, and likely enjoy just the game of it. The back and forth had been maddening, a veritable pro vs con argument. Cosima had finally been the one to break through, maybe a little more emotionally than she wanted to. If he was their only chance at finding Delphine, or even getting a lead -- then it was worth it. No one had to risk anything if they didn't want to, but she was going. So here they were. Sarah, mercifully at her side. 

"Oh I'm going to help you, I'm simply wondering what's in it for me." It was a statement rather than a question, and that in itself set Cosima on edge. He was too calculating, too _weasel-y_ , if she could pinpoint the word for it. He was also the only lead they had. 

"What do you want?" 

It was the first time Cosima had spoken up since the initial greeting, and she wished that she hadn't. Ferdinand's almost wolfish gaze drifted from Sarah to Cosima, seeming to really see her for the first time. What he did and didn't know about the scientist, they had no clue, but she suddenly felt very exposed. He didn't say anything for a few moments, simply sitting behind the steeple of his fingertips touching together, eyes searching her face. A deep inhale, and then he was back to looking at Sarah. 

"That's very simple. I've been working with a mutual acquaintance of ours who has a certain ... interest in rectifying this whole Neolution _infestation_. What she wants is very much in line with who I want: Rachel." 

Neither of them flinched, though Cosima did feel like she'd been doused in ice water. Sarah had warned her that there was no way Ferdinand would do anything for them without demanding something in return. Delphine had known that, too. The problem now was that they didn't have leverage. They were at a disadvantage, and Ferdinand knew it. 

"You're fucked if you think we're going to help you get that lunatic back from wherever they shipped her off to. Let 'em have her." Alright, maybe it wasn't the _best_ time for Sarah to say exactly what was on her mind, but there it was. 

The thing about Ferdinand was how eerily calm he was about so much of this. It was as though he knew where all the moves were going to take them anyway, and he was just waiting for the rest of them to catch up. A small smile edged into his features before he made a 'tsk' clicking sound with his tongue. 

"Now Sarah, that's hardly being a team player, is it?" 

Reaching into his coat pocket, he produced a smaller yellow envelope and slid it across the table to the two women. A glance was shared between them, tentative as Cosima peeled it open and the contents slid out. 

Photographs, one after the other: the van they'd seen in surveillance footage, another one of that same van engulfed in flames. Cosima didn't realize it until Sarah reached over to take the photos from her, that her hands were shaking. 

"Don't get all ahead of yourself, she's alive." It was offered without any actual empathy, more like a fact he was annoyed to give.

"You're sure?"

Reaching across the table, he pushed aside a few other photos to a black & white, zoomed in and grainy -- but enough to see four people, one in a wheelchair, on the tarmac of a private air field. 

"That was one week after she was taken from Dyad. I had a team monitoring all air fields in the city after Rachel was taken, hoping we'd be led to her..."

"Oi," Sarah cut him off, hand up to gesture a stop. "Rachel wasn't _taken_ anywhere. Delphine told me she's alive, for all we know, she's one of the Neolutionist freaks who had her hands in every pot."

"That's where you're wrong. I know Rachel." It was the first time Ferdinand got almost ... defensive. Defense of Rachel? It was enough to make both of the women feel as though their skin crawled. "From what I've gleaned, Nealon didn't disclose where he was shipping her off to. He could have told her, sure, but that was until your girlfriend offed him."

Silence took over the room with that revelation, Cosima's brows pulled together in a quizzical look. "She ... what?" As Ferdinand began to explain to them what he had found out through various "sources", his voice sounded hollow to Cosima. All she could see was Delphine's face as they stood on the sidewalk outside of Alison's store. She relived that moment so many times, but she closed her eyes for a second as though that would help her see it differently. She had been able to sense something was off that night, but she should have known. She should have known when Delphine was scared, she should have pressed, kept her there ... the game of "what if" was a really dangerous one but one she couldn't help playing. Delphine had killed Nealon, and Cosima didn't need to hear whatever pieced together details Ferdinand had to instinctively know what had happened -- Or some version. 

"So you see," It sounded as though he were making closing statements in a courtroom or something; knowing exactly how the verdict would come out. Cocky bastard. "It seems Delphine put us working together before we got here ourselves. I've my best guy hacking flight records, finding out exactly where that plane went."

He really did love the dramatic flair, didn't he? Both women looked at him expectantly. "Berlin. My bet is if we find one, we find the other." He took in the other women as the gravity of the situation continued to shape around them. 

"And there we have it. Comrades."

* * *

She couldn't remember the last time she'd had a decent night's sleep. Days bled together in here -- wherever "here" happened to actually be. No connection with the outside world, not even a calendar. Delphine would look at the team around her and wonder how many were here of their own volition. Some were easy to spot; yes, the girl with the silver hair and the boy with the genetically modified webbed fingers were clearly living and dying by the Neolutionist code. There was Stephen, the dark haired, quiet one who had barely spoken two words to her but did _excellent_ work with running diagnostics. His research was unparalleled, and she'd told him that. His response was a quiet nod, then he was back to work. What was his story? She wondered if he had a family ... had these people killed them? Had he been abducted? Was he merely playing the meek young man? She didn't trust anyone.

Delphine longed for days that were so far past her at this point. Sometimes she felt like it was the only salvation she had. She could sit on the stool in the lab and close her eyes for a few moments, or lie in bed and pretend like sleep would come to her if she willed it so. There was another part why she practiced this exercise. Part of her -- it had been a small part at first, but then grown increasingly large and bleak -- that worried if she didn't recall Cosima's face, it might fade away. It was silly of course, but she felt less and less like herself, the longer she was here. The longer she was powerless to fight, the more she felt like she was losing pieces of herself. 

Delphine refused to lose the part of herself that loved Cosima. 

There was a certain restlessness to her sleep, where she tossed and turned more than she gave into any depth of slumber. It was easier if she closed her eyes and remembered the timbre of Cosima's voice, or the way she laughed. She would remind herself of the lines of her face, the particular curve of her dimpled smile, the shape and color of her eyes behind glasses. She would try and feel the warmth of her lips or the gentle scrape of her teeth that accompanied a playful bite against her skin. 

"Doctor Cormier." 

The voice that cut through her reverie felt so sharp it was almost painful. As such, she jumped just a little, her heart jolting painfully in her chest. Weathersby stood expectantly on the other side of "her" desk, a report in his hand. She'd given it to one of the assistants ... she couldn't remember which one, just that morning. 

"You know, when I told you that you were looking tired, I didn't mean to take a nap during working hours." Delphine was sure he meant to at least sound more jovial, but his tone was too flat for that. 

"I wasn't sleeping. What's wrong?" Her own tone was flatter than his, but edged with the weary feeling that seemed to take hold of her more and more each day. 

"Absolutely nothing. This data is exactly what we had hoped for, bringing you here to work with us." He used such _kind_ terminology, like she actually had the illusion of a choice. "We're ready to move into trials."

That perked Delphine up exponentially. She sat up straight, brows pulled together as she stood, shaking her head. "Absolutely not. This is still so inconclusive. We're months away from that, at best."

There was that smile that could only be described as chilling. She felt a strength in her gut; it was too soon, and she had made sure of that. Her research and testing was on point, of course it was, but she had been so careful to only give the slightest bit of anything conclusive. She was buying herself time ... for what, she couldn't be sure. If they bulldozed what she was doing ... Delphine wasn't ready for that. 

"No, that's where you're wrong. We have a subject who has been properly prepared and ready for the implant. We'll continue to monitor her closely, of course."

Delphine was already shaking her head, moving closer to the doctor in her protest. "Perhaps you think that, but exactly how willing is this _subject_ of yours?" 

She fantasized about hitting him in his smug face. The look he gave her now was a perfect example of that.

"You'll find her extremely cooperative. Come, the team is getting her prepared."

His extended hand went ignored as Delphine breezed past him -- a move that would have been far more dramatic, had she not needed to stop at the doorway to wait for Weathersby to buzz them through the secure door with his keycard. 

Every time Delphine walked through the halls of this facility, she tried to memorize something new. The problem with that was how she had never been able to locate a direct route to outside. Not that she'd know what to do or _where_ she was if she happened to make it that far, but still. Every day, she tried to create more of a map in her head that went far beyond the lab and her quarters. Today, they took a left where she had only been right before -- leading them into what looked like a hall one might find in a spa -- only more sterile. "Up here." Weathersby seemed so expectant, almost excited -- if he was even capable of that emotion.

The door made almost a gasp as it opened, one of those sealed rooms as nurses parted ways to allow them room. She sat on the exam table in a gown, chattering on to anyone who would listen. It was a kind of nervous prattle, the sort that sounded so familiar to Delphine's ears. The kind that she missed. Her heart pounded as she took in the woman's slight frame. The voice might have been thick with accent -- Southern, she figured. Her hair was the familiar dark, but cut short, shorter than she had seen before. Same curve of her jaw line, same cheekbones ... And as she turned to look Delphine straight on, the same smile. It was so oddly bright, as though she had no idea what these people did here. 

"You must be the doctor they've been tellin' me so much about." She extended her hand, and Delphine shook it, still in a bit of a stupor. 

"Doctor Cormier," Weathersby interrupted her thoughts, but only barely. "I'd like you to meet Claire. Our first patient." 

She should have seen this coming, should have known that whatever this technology was they wanted her to perfect, it wasn't just for anyone. 

It was for Project Leda.

**Author's Note:**

> please forgive any poor French translation!


End file.
